Wednesday, June 23, 2010

I still can't think of a title

Hi Blog. My holidays are screwed. True that I have been revising some stuff, but holiday homework? Ha.Ha.Ha. Undone. But I'm not too worried about that. July will be a busy month, with my Terms and Guitar Exam and all. Blogging becomes a privilege in JC, or maybe I'm just too lazy to write.

I used to love writing, to be honest I always liked writing. However, why do I feel that writing has become a chore now? In fact, memory-related subjects feel like a chore now. Even my dear Chinese Literature. True, I suck at it. No doubt I have been failing more than I pass ever since I took on that subject. I have 1 year to build my foundation. Those who took that subject in secondary school, which means the other 4 of my classmates, had 4. Yes it is difficult, but yet I loved it. Now, thinking about it pushes me further away from my texts. This is worrying. Really. Come on Jerry, face your problems head-on. You have expectations to fufill.

Guess I'll just do my best now, which is pathetic because there will be regret again. Regret. Sighz...

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Guitar Camp

I'm back after 3 days 2 nights...... Honestly this camp has struck me in one particular aspect, albeit an unpleasant one, tells me that sooner or later I will get used to it.

Overall the camp was awesome, but one thing that left a sour taste in my mouth is the how the Exco Interview went. The seniors did put in alot of effort, and I applaud and respect them for that, going through every applicant's suggestions seriously. However, I felt really bitter about the fact that I was called for a last minute interview. It's really a bittersweet feeling that although I got into Exco, which I should be happy about. Why do I always get the feeling that the rationale behind my second interview was like "Oh actually we felt that you were not good enough, but since your friends asked us so sincerely to give you a chance, we shall give you that chance", sort of a "beggars can't be choosers" rationale.

That's what I felt. Honestly when I first heard what happened I felt insulted. Really insulted. Should I thank my friends who reccommended me? Or should I lament at my "plight" for not getting the position I want? I'm too tired to answer this question. Either way, what I'm telling myself to do now is to just look forward to what I can do as a QM. I'll make a seemingly insignificant job the most awesome one ever. The QMs of 2010-2011 will leave their legacy in ACGE. Hahahahahahahaaha......

One thing I've learnt in this camp:

Power and status are socially divisive, yet inevitable. Instead of lamenting and showing a poker face to others for so-called "taking your role", I'll just have to learn to restrain and kill these thoughts of jealousy and start thinking of what I can do now since God already gave me lemons.

On a side note:

I think women are sometimes extremely difficult to understand.